Aha, the title itself is confusing, isn’t it? How can our mind be in our control? Can we actually have a grip on our mind? Yes we can, we can condition our mind in a way we want to, to steer us in the right direction of life.
When a child is born, his mind is blank. Gradually when the child grows up he or she imbibes the atmosphere of home, seeps in the natural traits or behavioral pattern of the parents, and imitates the qualities of one or both the parents which the kid finds fascinating – his blank mind at birth thus gets imprinted with a distinct pattern. Then as parents we try to inculcate values and principles in our children, so the mind basket slowly gets filled with knowledge, instructions, societal norms, age old ideas of right and wrong, moral values and many a times our mind is utterly confused. We swim in the darkness of overdose of wisdom and knowledge and the reign of control slowly slips away from our hands.
But we do need to condition our minds in order to control our lives. Our mind is made up of different parts and each part can exert influence on our social behavior.
Let us first try and think out of the box. It might sound Hebrew or Latin but it is indeed possible. Tell your mind that you need time for yourself, ask your mind repeatedly not to go out in a wander lust and demand Me-Time, where you can just spend time with your own self. Then try and listen to your inner voice and that voice will tell you the next step if you are facing any problems of any kind. We should use our mind as a tool and not just let it remain inactive. So rumination has to be avoided by taking a walk, listening to music, reading motivational books or any books that catch your fancy, thinking about the worst case scenario and asking your mind how best you can handle it. Keep your mind at work because idle brain always a Devil’s workshop.
Nobody and I repeat nobody can change anything for you. You are the change, you will bring changes in your life and here you will instruct your mind to get adapted to the changes you are bringing, thus controlling your life. If you can adapt to the “Growth” mindset towards improvements, then your mind will also work in that positive direction.
We all have our individual qualities and you have to be optimistic about your own special quality which will lead to success. Share your success stories with your mind and in return your mind will only let you see the positive vibrant side of your personality. Pessimism has never done well to anybody; don’t let that happen to you. Failures are part of life but not the end of life, everyday is not fisted with your glory but the next day is a new day, new stories will be penned and you will tell your mind to hold that mantle of optimism when it draws you towards dark pessimism.
Stop the struggle to control everything in the world, you are no God. Your views and your opinions will not change anything in the globe, but over struggling to be a control freak will break your mental build up. Create a trough around yourself, prioritize your needs, make a to-do list and act. Being in charge of everything in the world is intoxicating, gives us a sense of power but is it truly needed? I am controlling everyone and everything throughout the day and at night I can’t control my own mind to sleep and have to pop in sleeping pills for that much needed sleep- is it worth it? NO. So re-appraise your controlling mind and see the change. Life will be much better.
We very easily jump into conclusions which are actually a thought trap, without any evidences to back up that thought process. What if that person doesn’t like me? What if I am not looking good in this outfit? What if people are not approving of my nature or my ways? What if I don’t party I will be left behind? And the mind goes in deep turmoil turning our lives upside down. So please ban these “WHAT IF’S” from your lives permanently. It is absolutely fine to be yourself. Everybody in the world will never like you and it should be mutual, you too cant like every single soul in the world. So be it. Come out of this constant grapple with your mind to be likeable to everyone and wrestle your mind out from jumping into baseless conclusions without any rock solid evidence to back them up. It will only create a furor in your mind pushing it towards certain sadness and life will become miserable.
“My life is ruined” I have said this umpteen number of times to myself and heard others saying it also in different times. Can we avoid catastrophizing for a change? Can we stop blowing things out of proportion or making a mountain out of a mole hill? Please employ logic and positive reasoning next time before you cry at our fate. Think the kind of life you are living might be a dream to some other people. The moment you let your mind rant about your current situation, however negative or not according to your choice currently, it will drown you into quick sand of depression my dear. So always think positive, condition your mind to see positive things in life and feel blessed to have the kind of life you have been bestowed upon, which some other less privileged people do not enjoy. Practice empathy for them and shun down jealousy at other people’s success or achievements. A happy mind creates a happy life and a covetous resentful mind leads to an insecure, bitter and grudging life. So choice lies with you, how you want to see your life- happy and content or spiteful and acquisitive?
There is more to come, please stay with me for the concluding part.
