Controlling emotion is very essential for social and professional growth. Most of us fail on this account. Without going into the details and without assessing the real cause of any problem, we react severely mostly out of impulsion. Can you control your emotion? How do you define your emotional level? Are you aware that it is a function of your personality? If you perform all your duties and responsibilities starting from wake up to retiring at night in an ideal way, you are a follower of rules and regulations of perfect living. It means that you always act with a purpose. You spend every moment of your life in a measured way to give an effective output. Why is it so? Because of all the functions, which you perform daily, you act with sincerity. But most of us perform our various functions as doers. Just for the purpose of doing, we act. For example, somebody smiles at you; you also reciprocate your instant function by providing a return smile. But mostly it is not an act with sincerity to serve any purpose. You are doing showmanship. You may not really want to smile, but since the other person is reputed in the society or quite an influential one, you simply smile. What you have done; you smile as a doer. If you delve into the fact of this pleasantry though smile from each other’s point of view, you will find the issue as purposeless. In simpler term, the other person has exchanged some pleasantries by smiling and you are being cajoled to give a return smile. But the act has no emotion in the real sense. He has expressed his positive vibe, which you have acknowledged in a controlled manner. You have judged his behavioral pattern and retorted back. Now, if you analyze your emotional effect in depth, your reciprocating action may be a bargain or a trade or a business type attitude or a simple social mannerism. In this particular case, it is a courtesy which falls under the social mannerism. Somebody smiles at you and you have also smiled. But it is an artificial smile, as the same is produced mechanically. Without utilizing your emotional feeling, you smile. It might not have created any emotional spontaneity for you for the other person. This type of emotion has no sincerity, has no cause and it is completely hollow as you have manipulated your smile. There is no authenticity on your part. In this way, you are manipulating your body and mind to act in that fashion. In our society, this type of manipulation is widely spread and people simply are not able to identify the emotional depth of this type of particular situation. Precisely, that is the reason, being religious also; we are not attracted to the spiritualities and functions of the spiritualism. Based on the artificial environment, we forget our spontaneity. Finally, we create a situation of confusion and chaos. We show love, but that love has no meaning because the same is impure. Your love is false. Similarly, your hate is false, your smile is false and your feeling is false. Your tears are false. You are not in a position to take any meaningful judgment.
The question comes how can you stay in this false environment and enjoy bliss? Instead of living in artificial surroundings, accept the spontaneity, which comes from your heart and you perform any action sincerely. Back to the scenario of smiling, you smile because that is the social norm, you learn from your parents, teachers or gurus. But that was not a sincere smile from your side. But this type of situation cannot be hidden for a long. Sooner or later, your pretension or non-spontaneity will come to the surface. You are pretending and not performing the real thing. But if you smile with sincerity, you will feel that your whole being is smiling; only your lips are not taking part. When you resort to this path of spontaneity with sincerity for any act of yours, everybody around you during that particular time will feel energized and there will be a friendly atmosphere. Since all the people around you will be happy; you will be connected to the profundity of happiness.
Even emotions need spontaneity. If positive emotions shown by you are false, the same will be treated as a pretense. In the same way, when the negative emotions performed by you as authentic, the same will be considered as perfect. People say anger is a destructive emotion. But this anger can be termed as valid if you’re really feeling angry. It means that you are not pretending to be angry. If you are really angry for any valid reason, despite it is being a negative emotion, your all sensations will be vibrant and people will not take you as a bad-tempered person. They may appreciate your negative emotion as you are showing spontaneity. For example, analyze the behavior of a child. He shouts and cries to fulfill his any need and no sooner his need is satisfied, he stops crying. You observe his behavior, which is completely based on spontaneity. Similarly, when a grown-up child becomes angry, he throws things from one corner to another, his face will be reddish, he may spit and he may throw anything he finds nearby. Seeing his behavior, one can opine that he may destroy the world, which is in his possession. When his anger subsides, he starts again running, dancing, hugging you, as if nothing has happened. For an adult, it is not the case. Because in adulthood, most of your actions are based on the false and you swirl in the movement of incorrect actions continuously.
If your anger is real, it lasts for a few seconds. Why? Because you are angry for a true cause and there is no false reason for your anger. At that point in time, your showing anger is justified and your anger is harmless. If anything evolves with spontaneity, it cannot harm anyone. The negative emotions are also good if they are authentic. People have wrong notions about negative emotions that these are bad and causing dangers both mentally and psychologically. The negative emotions are bad provided the reason is based on falsity. But if the negative emotions are authentic, it may transform us.
If you closely analyze the power of emotions, both positive and negative, you will find that emotion derived from authentic reasons will only do good. Now, if you are not able to control your negative emotions and show the same only for valid reasons, you will find the same emotions will not fluster you. You will handle the situation calmly. In this way, a time will come when you will not be affected either by positive or negative emotions. You will only cling to the reasoning factors and ascertain the authenticity before showing any emotion. At that stage, you will not discriminate between good and bad. The feeling of authenticity will strengthen your introspection power to search only for the real. And when you know the real, you will be able to find out the truth. Then emotions will not mold you, you will only mold the emotions.