The words are almost same words but come with bags of differences.
And when the line between the two words gets blurred, steps in chaos, crawls in confusion.
A marital alliance or nuptial is fixed between the families of the bride and groom, the wedding ceremonies take place and then MARRIAGE starts, and it is this simple.
We complicate it.
Wedding is 2 days or maximum 3 days affair now with the inclusion of urbane functions like sangeet, mehendi and age old traditions like haldi, shaadi and bidaai finaly.
Rather our grey matter does not let us come out of the wedding ceremonies even when the married life has started.
To sum up in these 2 or 3or 4 days the bride is the leading lady of this mini cinema, the solar system revolves around her, the photographers behave like crazy paparazzi waiting to pounce and click the celeb at the moment, all her bridal finery exposed in their full extravagance (sometimes someone in the background also announces the name of the designer….tacky, but they do!!!!!!). The bride is made to feel on top of the world, with five or six cousins always hovering around her with juice, cold tissues, and hand mirror and so on, like our spot boys do, they make a beeline around the heroine.
The story is more or less same with the groom. He is made to feel no less than a coveted celeb. The groom and his cousins and his friends unapologetically use all the resources provided by the bride’s family like their entitlement. They have come to do the most delectable job in the world, getting married, and nothing less would please them.
So basically the wedding party is happy with umpteen numbers of photo shoots, shaking a leg to hit chartbusters in the sangeet, our dulha dulhan dancing close to their favorite ball room number, the onlookers cheering and both the set of parents dabbing their eyes with high strung happy emotions.
Then comes the D- Day. With all the rituals the wedding is completed and now they are MARRIED.
Overnight the overenthusiastic cousins, friends of free fund, unless, aunts, aunties, all other elders promptly exit the wedding scene leaving the awestruck couple only with their immediate family.
They hit the rough ground-for the first time. The fairy tale is over, time for some reality check.
This is the time when actual MARRIAGE starts, those rose tinted functions were the starters, now comes the main course and it totally depends on an individual if he or she will deserve the sweet dish at the end.
Dear Lady, you are married now. Happy memories of your wedding are captured in all those ten thousand photographs and that cd, see it from time to time, but that is not your real life- that was a make believe world your parents created for their darling daughter. We all are the leading lady in our own story; like I am in my story- but hey do not try and act like a heroine in everybody’s life every day. Do not be delusional; those four days of your WEDDING are over, now your MARRIAGE starts. Please do not call up your best friend and complain if your husband forgets to say “I LOVE YOU” every morning comes running to you each time he see you after office-arms stretched , eyes inviting with an eyebrow arched just like a certain Mr. Khan in movies. (I doubt has he ever done this to his own wife who by the way is quite a glam doll). He is your husband not a screen icon. Marriage is much more than this. You have not married each other to recreate the iconic romantic scenes of Yash Raj Films or Dharma Productions, the acting stalwarts have done that, let it be there, in the celluloid. Your life is not a 70 mm screen- the sooner you realize this better is for your healthy marriage.
Stay Tuned Readers-some others facets of the topic coming up soon.